Quibble, 40. Array

In despair, Quibble gives herself up to the lord of control Alioth. When Alnasl and Asuja intervene, a glass fight breaks out.

goto

40. Array @Quibble

Dawn poured through the hayloft door and struck my eyes. Imay lay on the hay at my side, burrowed halfway into it, snoring loudly. As I sat up and picked straw out of my hair, the thought came back to me: What am I going to do?

I’ll tell you, said Meissa, if you’ll be calm and see reason.

I unwrapped the cloth holding my amber against my palm and pocketed the glass. Keeping nightmares at bay was a necessity, but I wanted to be alone with my thoughts now. I felt as if the amber had gotten me into this predicament. It was unfair to place blame there, and I knew it.

My willfulness got me here. I should have remained Within, obeyed Unity, accepted my loss, and comforted Quandary in his – sane, orthodox, responsible actions. What presumption I had, abandoning consensus, coming Without! I couldn’t have prevented Vega’s plot, for I’d known nothing of it, nothing of her really, but I could have been prudent enough not to keep walking into it after her manipulations first came to light. My naiveté stung me almost as badly as what had become of Quiddity.

Where was she? In an Egg, Nihal said. Had I passed her without knowing in the corridors of Egg 17? Was she the One I saw lying tranced? Could she even dream now?

Trapped in an amber. Driven deeper than the Depth of Night, as deep as Within goes. To my mother, who saw the shadows of Ones, who lingered at tarry-nots, who lived for light, there could be no greater damnation. Vega, how could you?

I was crying again. I thought of waking Imay, but he looked peaceful in sleep. The cares that usually beset him, clear in his frowns and severe manner, had fallen from him. Despite his hard life, I envied him. If we talked again, I knew, he would suggest a more moderate way than what was open before me now, but I resolved we wouldn’t discuss it. I’d burdened him enough. I would be a better friend if I left him without the guilt of failing to talk me out of suicide.

So, my way now: I would go back to the monastery; I would try to make amends to Nish, whatever they were worth; I would wait for the lord of control. I wouldn’t have to wait long, I sensed, now that I’d dismissed the array guarding me. Did they still keep watch from the hilltops? If so, it was pointless. They might follow me up the mountain, but if they tried to defend me when Alioth came to claim me, I would show them there was nothing to defend. I was not an excelsior, and I never would be.

I climbed quietly down from the hayloft. The sun was well up outside the stable. Deciding against saying farewell to Graph and Cord – they’d only try to talk me out of it, and what was the point of arguing? – I made a beeline for my cottage.

Few Adroit were out as I crossed the Axle. Most would rise late today, and their feast would start much later. I was sorry Nish wasn’t here to enjoy the celebration but glad she was as yet unaware of my misery. Things would be bad enough for her later. What was wise to tell her? All? Probably not. I would sort that out on the road.

I needed a few items for the journey: my pack, the pup tent if Nish hadn’t taken it, warm clothes for sleeping out-of-doors, enough food and water to get me there. Also, I should fetch Cate’s volume of Swift back to him, since Graph was uninterested in archaic heresy. The book was dear, especially given its good preservation.

The pup tent, thank kindness, was in the back of the closet. As I packed, the lone danger that might meet me on the road sprang to mind – the phantom Zero who chased me up the hill. On reflection, I found it unlikely he was a device of silence or kindness. I felt I knew Aladfar: he was stern, shrewd, under his cloak of silence a fearsome foe, but he wasn’t a cruel trickster. And for all her ploys, Vega gained nothing by alarming me. The others didn’t, either. The silence was probably right: the phantom was an adept of utter control.

Rasalased had expressed skepticism about excellence: what would an excelsior of utter control bring? That, I thought, must be why the adept stalked me. What he wanted precisely, I couldn’t guess, nor did it matter now. I just didn’t want to deal with him.

The pack full, I went to the outer room for the book. Nish’s note still lay under its corner. I tucked the note in among the pages, put it in the pack, did up the straps. At the door, I thought of the mirror and paused, turned back. A pity to leave it. I’d grown fond of looking at its double world. In the last cycle, as I stared with the amber glass in my hand at my reflection, a vague amber glow had surfaced from the mirror to envelope me. It felt good, though not in the way the dream of a kindness did.

It made me feel complete, as if somehow a piece of me had been missing, as if looking into the mirror with the amber supplied the missing piece, put it in place.

One last look.

Seeing my doppelgänger, I stayed my hand as it strayed to my vest pocket. Who are you? I asked. Minus loving Nish and the stupid excellence, who are you, Quibble?

A minute passed before the mirror, and then I heard someone scream outside the cottage. Far off, Graph bellowed in warning: “Zeros! Indoors! Zeros!”

Already?

I tore my eyes from the mirror, faced the center of the room, took a deep breath, and waited. A fountain of light streamed forth. There stood Vega.

“Quibble, come with me! Now!”

I was glad of the lady’s appearance. The truth from her own lips would steel me now for what came so soon. “Did you take Quiddity from our consensus?” I asked her.

“Yes. I did what I had to do. Now come! There’s no time!”

She made a leap to grab at me, and I skittered away, putting the bed between us. I felt for my amber, got ready to pop. Seeing this, she stood still. She trembled a bit. Again I knew it took all her patience not to light a glass and control me. Or she knew she had no power to control me anymore – I was beyond her grasp.

“Then pop away!” she pleaded. “Do it now!”

Put aside your hatred and listen to her! Meissa said.

Stay out of this!

“An array of control waits outside,” Vega told me. “If you walk out, they’ll seize you. If you stay, they’ll come. Alioth is their lord. He follows edict. He’ll kill you.”

“I welcome it,” I said. “One thing will keep me from giving myself up to him. Go fetch Quiddity and bring her here. Will you do that?”

“I can’t. I’ll explain why, but not now!”

“There’s nothing to explain or discuss! I’m One. I belong Within. If Alioth gives me back to Unity, fine, I’ll accept it. If he rectifies me, I’ll accept that, too.”

Vega’s jaw hung open. A tear fell from her right eye. “No!” she breathed.

“Goodbye, lady,” I said, and away I popped.

Calling up a memory for the amber was easy. I emerged on the cottage doorstep. A few yards away stood the lord of control Alioth, six Zeros several paces behind him. To the southwest, I heard the echoes of numerous pops. A glass fight, I guessed.

Alioth’s adepts all bore red glasses. One popped to the right of me, another to the left. The Zero on my right grabbed my forearm, jerking my hand from my pocket, and I let the amber slip from my fingers before it could fall out. The Zero on my left raised a glass to menace me, but he refrained from lighting it. In fact, all six adepts seemed reluctant to fire their glasses, as if they didn’t know what might happen, and I realized they held back because they had no idea what I could do. Alioth’s eyes alone met mine without fear.

The lord uncovered his left hand. I prepared for control, but in his hand was no glass. He slipped it in his cloak at his waist and drew out a long, thin dagger. Panic wrung my gut as I imagined it lunging at my throat.

“You won’t need that, lord!” I protested. “I won’t fight. I’ll go with you willingly. I ask only two things, small things.”

Alioth’s gaze remained blank, but he said, “Name your terms.”

“Let me see Quiddity, who is Numberless. She’s in some Egg – Vega can tell you which. Once I’ve seen her, you may satisfy edict. But I’d rather not die by that dagger! Rectify me at the Arc of Summary, where One should die. Is that not edict?”

“There will be no summary, no silence,” Alioth said. “It will happen by daylight, and I will do it.”

No hope of transcendence. “Very well,” I agreed.

The lord of control considered a moment, then gave me assent. I returned assent, closing and opening my eyes, to seal the pact. He sheathed his dagger and took out a blood-red glass. “I will not be tricked,” he said.

“No trick,” I answered.

As if to make me a liar, a penumbra of light opened between me and Alioth. In its place stood a white-cloaked figure with its hood up. When I saw how brightly the amber burned in the Zero’s right hand, I knew it was Alnasl. He held in his left hand a vivid sky-blue kindness, but he knew better than to light or raise it yet.

“Lord, release my protégé!” he demanded.

“She and I have struck a bargain,” Alioth informed him.

“For her life?”

“Her death. See her rectified at the arc, if you wish, but you won’t interfere again. Nor will your heretic Utopia. Kindness will assent, or there will be war.”

Alnasl stood his ground. “Quibble,” he said, “what’s this bargain?”

“It’s not your concern, vision.”

My words must have pierced him, for he spun, turning his back on Alioth. Before he could say a word, another Zero, maroon-cloaked, popped in behind him. I thought at first it was Alsephina, but then Alioth cried, “Asuja! Your role in this is at an—”

He had no time to say more. Fire flared from the strange Zero’s hand, raised in a flash before the lord’s face.

At once my eyes went to the control, magnetized. I couldn’t escape or look away. As my breath bolted out of me, I knew it was a rectifying dream and I fought to excel it. There was pain – the pain was excruciating – and I could see everything around me, but where was touch? Nowhere. Still the adept on my right held me by the arm, but I couldn’t feel his grasp. I couldn’t even flex a finger to touch myself. Controlled utterly, trapped under the ice of a frozen red lake, I could do nothing but stand and watch.

The adept on my left lit the glass he held before my eyes. It didn’t capture me: utter control, though farther away, eclipsed it. Alnasl sprang, kindness aflame yet faint to my eyes, and the adept fell mesmerized beneath his glass’s gaze. Seizing him by an arm around the shoulders, Alnasl popped out. The pop’s crack rang in my ears as blood spattered me. Alnasl reappeared a few feet away, holding what remained of the adept – half of him was gone, cleaved away in a jagged tear from collarbone to hip. A cascade of blood gushed from the Zero’s severed torso, and he spat more blood from his mouth as he choked. His head lolled and his eyelids drooped half shut.

Alnasl dropped the half-corpse and eyed the adept on my right, who pushed me away, reaching for a glass to fight with. Immediately the vision popped out, in again – a halo of blue radiating from his raised hand – right in front of the adept, who had drawn his own glass now and met Alnasl’s attack with a counterattack of control.

Suddenly, I was free of the dream. I gulped in air. I was sweating profusely. The adept of control and Alnasl stood facing, each with an arm outstretched, eyes locked on the other’s glass, ambers blazing hot. Neither the red nor the blue glass tranced me. Their dreams were solely for the enemy each Zero faced, or perhaps the aftermath of the stranger’s control left me incapable of being tranced.

I looked in wonder at the mysterious Zero in the maroon cloak, who still had his back to me. At his feet lay Alioth. The lord’s mouth gaped and his eyes gazed lifelessly at me. The irises had turned red. Rectified.

“Come, cowards!” Asuja roared at the other Zeros.

All four adepts were backing away from him. Though his hand was raised, Asuja left his control unlit as if to show them that he had no fear – they should be afraid. One by one, they began popping out. Just one remained when I heard Alnasl yell: “It’s the phantom, Quibble! Pop out! Run!”

Still the vision faced his enemy. Both of their faces were awash in light as they strained for mastery in the clash of dreams. I dug in my vest pocket for my amber and stepped forward, unsure what I could do to help Alnasl. To my left, a pop cracked – the last of the four adepts Asuja faced had fled.

Alnasl’s voice filled my mind: Are you crazy?! Forget me! Utter control! Go! Now!

I hovered, caught between my fears, and espied Asuja in negative. Kneeling, he cast aside the fallen lord’s cloak and yanked out the dagger.

Go! I told the amber.

Where?

Anywhere!

I popped.

< Previous chapter | Index | Glossary | Appendix | Next chapter >

rem

One is welcome to comment.